It is the true teacher who leaves the class knowing they have learned the most.
Tucson, AZ
Joined September 2006
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I'll figure it out. I want to enjoy these better times. It was MY decision to stop this stupid drug, get away from the other clinic which wanted to cut me open and that would have killed me. He told me in December I had mere weeks. I'm actually medically BETTER. Not from them.
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What breaks my heart more than anything is the absolute lack of care shown to me by the person who is supposed to be helping, and I had to pay her for five minutes of her time and no counseling, which is not what she should provide. I curse her. She harms. She is cold. Therapist?
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And that is to undergo Ketamine treatment. It's a series of around 6 guided processes under the drug and then follow up per month or year or never depending. I love that model. You're in, your out. I'm also calling Arizona Oncology to see if they can help with a referall.
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I'm going to call @UHC again, they have been trying. They are not succeeding either. There are online clinics but the only ones that can taper safely are not covered by any insurance. They are drug dealers for rich people. Fuck that shit. The other legal option is less costly.
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an SSRI (FUCK NO), Gabapentin (Useless) and Hydroxizine, which may calm me but will not stop seizures. They are not a good sign, especially that I lost hours and woke up on the floor once, and halfway out the balcony door on the concrete when Honey started yowling for me, sweet.
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It is not my time to go. I know this, I will not die, I will try every legal source and if I can't find one, I will find an illicit one. I say this without fear of repercussion. If the law wants to deal with my sorry ass, they will at least get me a doctor. The NP insisted I add
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I have called national, state, local resources from hotline, warmline, VA, all. They are all very kind, and are also saying I have to find an actual psychiatrist who knows how to properly taper long term benzos. I could use a therapist too for the duration of this horror.
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I'm not doing well so forgive my rant. I'm in the midst of the worst kind of hell, and have had two seizures. my primary care called right away and wants me in the hospital. I refuse. I refuse to sit in a waiting room, lie in a hospital bed, die in a medical facility. EVER.
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she never loved him, she enjoyed some companionship with him but mostly made him her indentured servant as she had done with me but she wanted to be with me. She said "don't you have anything to say to my grieving daughter?" His words: "Oh well, that's the way it goes."
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She had finished chemo, was recuperating from her hip surgery and while improving, still very confused. She thought *I* was not wanting to stay there with her, which had been our family plan all along. Yet he stood blocking my way to the suite she made for her children.
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getting to Las Vegas after Ray died and my mother said come. That stepfather shite should have gone to vietnam and died. He went to Princeton on a wrestling scholarship, lied, cheated, stole and when I got there my Mom said come in! Where's Honey while he blocked me from HER home
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This is a tragic nightmare. So many people are living it right now and that makes me feel so sad. My idiot of a Nurse Practitioner who thinks this 3 week taper of a 38 year high dose benzo is just fine. I've had 2 tonic clonic seizures, only time that happened was 24 hours after
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There is no one in Arizona that has said they can do this but the one that I'm with and she does not know how to do this she is not a doctor I want a medical doctor this is a medical issue. Check out the video you may get insight
Frustrated. I am not afraid. I will take care of myself and the whole point is getting away from the harmful Medical use of pharmaceuticals that are unnecessary. I was 21 I am now almost 60. Oh I am asking is for is informed Medical Care it is not happening
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I do not like Jordan Peterson very much yet I empathize with his clonazepam withdrawal in this video. I did not have existing anxiety. I did have some indicators of a rare serious medical condition which I am now living 9 years past true Diagnostics.
youtube.com/z6uj2FiBXVY
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I'm not a hero. I'm just stubborn as hell and I will work for justice every time knowing Justice is an illusion. I have a wonderful world of friends I don't want to leave. I have work to be done including the justice that we so harmed by medicine need illuminated and eliminated.
What are you talking about there is no War on Drugs even with thousands of pounds of meth and phenol being stopped at the border in Arizona meth crystals laying down from the sky and pressed fentanyl pills cost $1.25 a piece. You think Biden did that you are really uninformed.
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Does anybody know anyone I can see even if I have to pay out of pocket I will scrape it together somehow I need informed care. Who can help me? 38 years of Triumph to think all I have overcome only to die from a withdrawal from prescription I did not ever need would be homicide.
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