Once in a while I just have to make jokes. Even when the darkest clouds are hovering. Especially when they are hovering! So. Jokes. Got some?

I was riding on the bus and a guy next to me showed me a photo of his wife. "Isn't she beautiful?" he asked. "If you think she's beautiful, you should see my wife," I replied. "Oh, is she beautiful, too?" he asked. "No... she's an optometrist."