How do you perceive yourself at the end of it all isn't that most important or is there a greater struggle that I don't connect with because I simply cannot I've never transitioned? I think it's more to do with preconceived notions of how we're supposed to act in our gender roles

Not because of any other reason then she had had a picture of having six daughters that you can dress up like little dolls this is a feminist scholar by the way I'm I'm describing a very renowned woman and that they would be just like her femme-fatale perfectionism hahaha hahaha

I wanted to have six daughters but then I had you! She was brilliant beautiful not in the least a nurturer good heavens the opposite she left that for me and what was left of my father. She had anger because I took her perfect image of me as her doll and jumped in mud puddles.

She herself had relationships with women and men was more into men typically and usually the worst of them except my dad who was send into South Korea with his best friend came home with a broken head a Purple Heart fragments of shrapnel and his best friend in his back. He broke.

But thank goodness I had him when I was born as first child because she turned away and repeatedly in her narcissistic personality way repeating over and over the story "I looked at you and saw a tiny baby who was the strongest smartest fiercest creature" I was two days old.

So for that I'm very grateful and took joy in caring for my brothers when my mom wasn't enthusiastic about the logistics of motherhood but loves her children. she was an academic, a scholar, an activist on a mission to prove a woman could have a Ph D and still do it all and did.

Sadly though she had a lot of rage and it came out physically more on my brother Morris whom she adored and brutality became his for a while he overcame it though and I asked him how he said I realized how exhausting it is to be that awful and filled with rage! Best of us all