Don't rely on an iPhone as an alarm clock. "Update overnight" means "sure I didn't want to get to my appointments on time", as all alarms are disabled post-auto-update until you run through the "what's new" screen

Android is just so much better at this - installs the update in the background then prompts you to reboot, and the reboot is super quick too. Never really understood why Apple has always lagged behind with this stuff.

I've never had android do that. What am I missing?

Probably a new enough release (or the vendor patch method is worse). It’s been there on my Pixel since at least Oreo, I remember them demoing it at LPC in Santa Fe.