This is somehow the fakest article you guys ever posted

just gonna leave this here:

You think a guy that jumps on his enemies heads till they disappear wouldn’t shoot them in stead. Ooooh ok 👍

Mario is a homunculus who is incapable of understanding or committing evil.

Has anyone paid any attention to Mario? He’s a friggin monster!

Koopa Troopas are like:

Which is why Kirby and Samus do the shooting instead.

Luigi, on the other hand....

That’s literally untrue since he killed my entire family

So what I'm getting is, Mario would rather get the pleasure of killing his enemies by proving his overwhelming strength by killing them barehanded, as well as feeling them being crushed horrifically under his feet?